The Royal show is on again in Perth and if your FOMO meter is peaking, but you don’t have enough time to get there because you spend all your time searching for kosher cheese and cutting you’re your neighbours palm tree, then check out these alternative showbags.

JCC WA $10
Contains propaganda on why you should vote Yes for the Voice, rubble from the old Jewish Centre,  and for the first time ever an interfaith plastic figurine set representing  multicultural communities and their customs.   Each bag contains a mystery figurine of a Jewish community leader.

Maccabi Soccer Club $5
Includes supporters merch, a free sausage voucher, and a discounted Maccabi membership voucher. Exclusive this year  guide on how to effectively use social media.

J-Hub – $10000
The J Hub bag for community organisations offers rent space for offices, but they might not sell that well because your favourite community group might not be able to afford it.  

Jews for Cheeses – $27.50
For the first time ever all the kosher suppliers in Perth have combined forces to show Kosher consumers what’s on offer. Bags include a bargain 1KG Tempo block of cheese.  Bonus additional pictures of kosher Babybel cheese from Israel that is kosher even though ours isn’t but is likely to be made by the same people in the same factory.  Also includes a list of other exotic cheese from Melb that are currently unavailable in Perth. The first 10 bags sold contain a free voucher to the next KA information evening on why vegan rennet is not considered kosher enough for mass cheese production.

Tash Peterson – $100 (tax deductible)
This bag is a donation and considered tax deductible, check the fine print. Exclusive access to the next protest against kosher meat production and consumption with full legal immunity. Rumour has it that a massive demonstration was planned outside some of Perth’s finest kosher meat eatery’s but no location has been provided. You can’t protest what does not exist.

Carmel School – $50
Packed with brochures on what makes Carmel school so special, look out for a picture of your child or grand kid. The show bag contains a special voucher for an ontime appointment at three way interviews. Free puffer jacket included, last year’s model only !!

Super Size Shules combo – Free if you are a paid up member
All shules except Chabad have combined to create a combo showbag. Contains a free raffle ticket First prize – a free shule seat at a service of your choice but note it does exclude Kabbalat Shabbat music minyan. Second prize – Whiskey shot  with the Rabbi at Dianella Shule on Shabbos morning.Third prize – Sports and halacha session with Rabbi Dan

Chabad Shule combo – free to everyone
Contains a yellow Yehi flag, a sample of cholent, a copy of the Tanya published in your suburb, shemura matzo and a train ticket to Fremantle.

MZH – $10
The MZH showbag includes free covid masks and a dozen expired rat tests so you can be ready for your next visit.  Free advance copies of  Rabbi Coleman’s next five books and  a 10% discount voucher for a room in the residents village.

Kohanim Mega Pack – $299
This one is for the meat lovers with a touch of religious zeal. The best BBQ recipes from a selected panel of Kohanim, based on over 2000 years of real world experience. Pick up your meat pack containing lamb chops and 12 different cuts of beef and special limited edition korban spicy sauce. Includes free pre shabbat video brachca for the entire family. Steak knives not included.

AUJS – $50
Forget the meat this bag is all about the alcohol and we aren’t talking about the single malt. Plenty of beer, wine and spirits mixed with brochures on identifying as a Jew on campus and how to combat antisemitism on campus. Also includes guides to adulting covering such controversial topics as why do I have to pay for my phone and rent and lifestyle choices ?

Tim Tam Showbag – Cancelled due to shipping delays
Get these wonderful Australian icons that were manufactured in Sydney, shipped to Israel and then returned by airfreight.  No local produce available because it’s not kosher enough for the KA but once shipped to the Middle East and re imported to Australia it is ok for consumption.

Superheroes without capes – $10
Contains toy figurines of the real heroes of our community, those tirelessly volunteering for MZH, Menora Foundation, The Chevra Kadisha and many other causes. All money raised will be donated to a worthy cause.