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The Royal show is on again in Perth and if your FOMO meter is peaking, but you don’t have enough time to get there because you spend all your time searching for kosher cheese check out these alternative showbags.

showbagsJCC WA $10

Low on substance and credibility but high on feelgood. Contains video links to community information sessions on why you should vote Yes for the Voice, propaganda on why the JCC WA is extrinsically focused to the detriment of community members and for the first time ever a plastic figurine set representing each of the areas most focused on during the year, first nations rights, women’s rights, interfaith. Still looking for the figurine of a Jewish community member.

Maccabi Soccer Club $5
Should have been on sale for $20 but the recent soccer match played on second day Rosh Hashanah has diminished the brand value. Includes supporters merch and a discounted Maccabi membership voucher. Exclusive this year are special recordings of the elder Maccabi elite complaining that the sports reports no longer appear in the Maccabean. Please can anyone show them what social media is ?

J-Hub – $10
The J Hub bag has been withdrawn at the last minute due to community entitlement. No one expected to pay for it, isn’t it free because we are part of the community ?

Jews for Cheeses – $45
For the first time ever all the kosher suppliers in Perth have combined forces to show Kosher consumers what’s on offer. Bags include 2 x 1KG Tempo block of cheese (This is worth more than the bag alone) and pictures of kosher Babybel cheese from Israel and other exotic cheese from Melb that is currently unavailable in Perth. Free voucher to the next KA information evening on why vegan renet is not considered kosher enough for mass cheese production.

Tash Peterson – $100 (tax deductible)
This bag is a donation and considered tax deductible, check the fine print. Exclusive access to the next protest against kosher meat production and consumption with full legal immunity. Rumour has it that a massive demonstration was planned outside some of Perth’s finest kosher meat eatery’s but no location has been provided. You can’t protest what does not exist.

Carmel School – $50
Packed with brochures on what makes Carmel school so special, look out for a picture of your child or grand kid. One bag contains a special fee free voucher for the lifetime of your child’s education, that surely makes the $50 worth it. Free puffer jacket included, last year’s model only !!

Super Size Shule combo – Free if you are a paid up member
All shules except Chabad have combined to create a combo showbag. Contains a free raffle ticket First prize – a free shule seat at a service of your choice but note it does exclude Kabbalat Shabbat music minyan. Second prize – Whiskey session with the Rabbi at Dianella Shule on Shabbos morning. Third prize – Sports and halacha session with Rabbi Dan

MZH – $10
The MZH showbag includes free covid masks and rat tests so you can be ready for your next visit, Top 10 recordings of Rabbi Coleman sermons and a 10% discount voucher for a room in the residents village.

Kohanim Mega Pack – $299
This one is for the meat lovers with a touch of religious zeal. The best BBQ recipes from a selected panel of Kohanim, based on over 2000 years of real world experience. Pick up your meat pack containing lamb chops and 12 different cuts of beef and special limited edition korban spicy sauce. Includes free pre shabbat video brachca for the entire family. Steak knives not included.

AUJS – $50
Forget the meat this bag is all about the alcohol and we aren’t talking about the single malt. Plenty of beer, wine and spirits mixed with brochures on identifying as a Jew on campus and how to combat antisemitism on campus. Also includes guides to adulting covering such controversial topics as why do I have to pay for my phone and rent and lifestyle choices ? If you can’t afford the $50 your Ma or Pa.

Tim Tam Showbag – Cancelled
This was included and then withdrawn at the last minute. No local produce available because it’s not kosher enough for the KA but once shipped to the Middle East and re imported to Australia it is ok for consumption.

Superheroes – $10
Contains toy figurines of the real heroes of our community, those tirelessly volunteering for MZH, Menora Foundation, The Chevra Kadisha and many other causes. All money raised will be donated to a worthy cause.

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